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My Ideal Jukebox

If someone gave you a classic Wurlitzer jukebox, what songs would you put in it?

A few ground rules:

A classic Wurlitzer holds fifty songs, so that’s how many you can choose.
You’re not restricted to songs that were released as 7" 45 RPM singles; album tracks are allowed.
The length of a song doesn’t matter (it’s an ideal jukebox). However, different tracks count as separate songs. For example, Beethoven’s seventh symphony would count as four songs.
If you can document that two songs were released as opposite sides of the same 45 RPM record, you can include both while only counting one. If you later remove one, you must remove the other.

With those rules in mind, it took a few days to stock my ideal jukebox. Here’s the list, in no particular order. (* indicates a single I or my brother owned.)

Playlist

96 Tears, ? and the Mysterians
This was at the top of the charts just before I was born. If I’d known, I’d have left the womb early. Why doesn’t anyone tell me these things?
Time Has Come Today, The Chambers Brothers
Howard Waldrop’s great story “Do Ya, Do Ya Wanna Dance?” described this as “always a show stopper, a hard song for everybody including the Chambers Bros., if you ever saw them”. I heard the Ramones’ cover first, but the original’s better.
Respect, Aretha Franklin
A classic that ~~should be~~ is in every single jukebox in the world.
Heat Wave, Martha and the Vandellas
Light My Fire, The Doors (album version -- see rule 3)
Arguably the best-structured song in rock’n’roll. The extended solos pull me right into the song, capturing my attention so completely that the restatement of the theme after the bridge makes me feel as though I were returning home after traveling the world for years.
Dancing with Myself, Billy Idol
Pump It Up, Elvis Costello & the Attractions
Brazil, Geoff Muldaur
It’s Martini Time, The Rev. Horton Heat
An anthem for the retro cocktail crowd.
Got My Mo-Jo Working (But It Just Won’t Work On You), Ann Cole
The Politics of Dancing, Reflex
15 Storey Halo, ABC
Dance Hall Days, Wang Chung
This Beat Goes On/Switchin’ To Glide, The Kingsmen (The Toronto Kingsmen, not the Portland “Louie, Louie” Kingsmen)
One of the all-time great just-get-out-on-the-road-and-drive songs. This showed up on one of my brother’s tapes in high school, and I fell in love.
Flagpole Sitta, Harvey Danger
I first heard this while back in NY for a visit, listening to a college radio station while driving around. I had no idea what it was, but it was the first time in years that I liked a song I’d heard on the radio. It took a while to track down. Viva bubble-grunge!
You Can’t Hurry Love, The Supremes (#1 on the charts when I was born)
If I can’t have “96 Tears” for my natal song, this is a worthy consolation prize.
Baby Love, The Supremes
Runaway, Del Shannon
Goldfinger, Shirley Bassey
It’s brassy! It’s Bassey! And it’s undeniably bigger-than-life fun.
Baby I’m a Star, Buddy Miles
This Prince cover was running through my head on a day when everything was going oh so right.
C30 C60 C90, Bow Wow Wow
What can I say? I’m a sucker for that Bow Wow Wow/Adam & the Ants drum sound.
Summer in the City, The Lovin’ Spoonful
Crocodile Rock, Elton John
The first rock’n’roll song I liked, at age 5 or 6. When we went to the local restaurant, I’d bug my parents for a dime for the jukebox to play this.
Where Did Our Love Go, Diana Ross and the Supremes
Church of the Poisoned Mind, Culture Club
It’s the gospel voice that makes it.
Cool for Cats, Squeeze
How can you not dance?
Romeo and Juliet, Dire Straits
In any jukebox, there’s gotta be at least one song for the lovelorn. Why not pick one with the great lyrics of Mark Knopfler?
Love is Like a Bottle of Gin, The Magnetic Fields
For those quiet 2 AM moments.
One Less Bell to Answer, The Fifth Dimension
Yes, it’s sap, but it’s good sap.
Do You Remember Rock’n’Roll Radio b/w Do You Wanna Dance, The Ramones
Ramones at their retro-’50s danceable finest.
Senses Working Overtime b/w Ball and Chain, XTC
The pure exuberance of living.
New Frontier, Donald Fagen
Take Five, Dave Brubeck
Live, Bangles (cover of The Merry-Go-Round’s song)
Pure Pop for Now People.
My Last Cigarette, k.d. lang
We Are the Champions b/w We Will Rock You, Queen*
I hated “We Will Rock You” on first hearing (I was what, 12?), but over the years I’ve come to appreciate its completely over-the-top adolescent silliness.
Don’t Box Me In, Stan Ridgway & Stewart Copeland
On Fly on the Wall, Stan tells the amusing story of the genesis of this song and its briny couplets. If this is what comes from him working under pressure, let’s put the screws to the guy.
Go For It, Joe Jackson
Joe isn’t known for his upbeat, exuberant songs, but when he wants to he can hit one out of the stadium.
I Want You to Want Me b/w Ain’t That a Shame, Cheap Trick (I’d prefer “Surrender”, but IWYTWM is a better jukebox cut)
The Message, Grandmaster Flash
Tequila, The Champs
Put on the big shoes and get up on the bar, amigo.
Ride Captain Ride, Blues Image*
Baker Street, Gerry Rafferty*
25 or 6 to 4 b/w Where Do We Go From Here, Chicago
Gotta love the powerful horn section.
Takin’ Care of Business b/w You Ain’t Seen Nothin’ Yet, Bachman-Turner Overdrive*
How often do you find a band’s two best songs on the same 45? I haven’t seen it anywhere but this single.
Couldn’t Get It Right, The Climax Blues Band*
Would I Lie To You, Eurythmics
Tusk, Fleetwood Mac
Makes a nice double bill with “We Will Rock You”, but I like it for itself too.
Smooth Operator, Sade
Ballroom Blitz b/w Wig Wam Bam, Sweet*
When we were young, my siblings and I got a lot of kicks out of playing the single at 78 RPM. Ever wonder what Sweet sounds like as Chipmunks on speed?

That’s my list. What’s in your ideal jukebox?

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