Little Mole (first draft)
Clément Marot and Mark L. Irons
11 February 1999
Little mole
In your hole,
Darkness hide.
4 Why reside
In this cell
'Til you're well?
Come with me
8 And we'll flee
To give praise
Through long days.
Don't stay pent,
12 Resident,
Hid away.
End your stay.
Let's go mine
16 Stone divine.
Gems and ore
Are in store
For those who
20 Remain true.
Hands that glow
Warn of woe;
Instead dig
24 (Zag and zig)
Tunnels deep.
Darkness keep
Cloaked your soul,
28 Little mole.
Notes
Line 3, "Darkness hide": a traditional Mohelmot well-wishing greeting.
Lines 7-10 are particularly confusing and weak. The sacramental aspect in Mole culture of long work is much too obscure. This section needs reworking, if not complete replacing.
Lines 11-13 are a multi-level play on meanings. The first is Line 12, "Resident"; it refers to the creators of the Moles, and thus parallels Marot's self-referential insertion of the author's name into the poem. On another level, this can be seen as a plea from the Mohelmot for the (hidden) creator to reveal themselves. Finally, this can also be read as a direct plea to the unknown Residents to unmask themselves.
Note that these interpretations encompass three of the four possible interactions between fiction and reality. The first is contained completely within the fiction; in the second, fictional characters address reality; finally, reality addresses reality.
Lines 15-17 are the Mohelmot equivalent of eating sweets. They're a hard-working race.
Lines 19-20 ("For those who / remain true.") are also weak. True to what? I want the poem to have a religious feeling, but this is too nebulous.
Lines 22-23 have a transition that's too jarring, and needs work to bring some sense into it. "Hands that glow" is shameful in Mole culture, but how does that lead into digging?
When I finished the initial draft tonight, somehow it came out as 30 lines. How did that happen?
Last updated 8 June 2000
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All contents ©1999-2002
Mark L. Irons
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